In the end, this is all that matters.

i read through it although it was so hurtful and long to continue with,

while my tears rolled down,

thinking why he would say such words to me in the first place. 

they say, what's from the heart, come's out from the mouth.

so i guess it's true, there isn't anything left and all you want is a break.

i thought about it the whole night, and yes. I'll let you have it.

loving someone does not mean we need to be with that person,

as long as that person is happy, you should be happy for him/her. 

and yes, i'm happy for you. 

i know i shouldn't be looking back at the past but there are so many reasons why i do it. 

they say first loves are hard to forget, that makes it even harder to hate that person,

and i know you'll never forget her neither will you hate her no matter how much you deny it. 

that's probably why I can't accept the fact or trust you with these. 

you've done everything with her. who am i now? i'm sure there are times where we went out together,

that made you remember about the past. didn't it? you guys had so much to remember and i am just the one in the middle. out of nowhere i just feel that way. oh and worst still our anniversary is on the same day which is 17th, how the fuck will i feel? i just feel like a fuckin' replacement, seriously. oh and worst still you blog soooooo much about her, and for me i don't see anything new or different from what you do for her. read your blog, and it was really sweet of you posting up things for her and ending it with an 'ily'.
you don't even show me much affection anymore, all i see is just you being tired and bored of everything. 
you don't even care when i buy you something. not even a single appreciation or even a "thank you" from you when i even bought you the drink cos' you're sick before i went to college. 
not a single post on my wall for my birthday, not even a shoutout or a status for me anymore. not a single reply on fb when you can reply all your friends but not me. you broke my heart even on my birthday and yet i'm wiling to forgive you.
to come to think of it, i feel like a fool. worst still, i'm at my worst now. all i want to do is just be alone for now. i don't deserve all this from you. not at all. like what people say, it's like i'm the only one caring so much about this relationship but not you and i deserve better.

i still remember everything that you've told me in the past. right until today. whatever you told me and what you said you'll be. but it's all different now, ain't it? because people fucking change! 

i'm done trying to convince myself that everything feels alright. but in the end, i know it will never be the same for you, no matter how hard i try. 

it's just too hard for me and i can't take it anymore.


p/s : i'm not jealous or anything, but frankly speaking, i just feel like a replacement. really. and it really hurts being in this situation. it just sucks to be me. 

it's you who let me go in the end, so let it be. goodbye.